Monday, May 24, 2010

A Divergence

You, my mentor
Patiently worked through
the haze of my youth
You taught me how
to be tough, political, clear
Lessen the pain of life
We spoke the same language
rooted in growing-up hungry
We learned to work hard and share

You, my sister
Made a place for me to rest
when money was scarce
You filled my belly and my being
Fed, nourished, transformed
Around your table
we talked and laughed
Rooted in each other’s strength
Hard times lessened by the sharing

20 years my friend
Even as I went further into
my toughness and political leaning
Declared myself a dyke separatist
Railed, raged, revolted
against the men and their world
I saw that tolerant smirk on your face
but loved you anyway
Deep down we were still allies

Who were you?
When you announced
your marriage to your “wife”
I offered no congratulations
Got your house, 2 cars, vacations
You offered only criticism
of my life in the margins
Suddenly we had no language
Our hearts hard and closed

You, my betrayer
Still asking me when
will I give up
my rough around the edges life?
Used, tattered, worn
You want me to be ashamed
that I have food stamps
or despite my degree work in the dirt?
Share what little I have

For you, my regret
I let my principles
no matter how right
withhold the affirmation of your love
Instead I gave silence, contempt, judgement
Seeing you settle down
I thought you’d settled
for an easy life
One I could no longer share

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